A promise to remember
Well, it's been quite a while since I actually sat down and read the Bible for more than a Bible study (like homework style) or to find a quick verse relating to a problem. This month and next I am trying to do a Survey of the Bible and some things spoke to me.
Today's reading was Exodus 1-5, but I read 6 too. And got a promise and a look into my response. Talk about a lightbulb moment. Ex. 6:6-7 reads
"I am the LORD. I will free you from your oppression and rescue you from your slavery in Egypt. I will redeem you with a powerful arm and great acts of judgement. I will claim you as my own people, and I will be your God. Then you will know that I am the LORD your God who has freed you from your oppression in Egypt.
Now this is a promise I can grab hold of. And here, I think has been my unwilling response. I struggle with grabbing onto and holding onto and beleiving the promises of God. I know that they are true, and have been proven, I just have a hard time accpeting them for myself. Does that make any sense? Probably not, but that's me. And here is a reflection of me. Ex. 6:9 reads "So Moses told the people what the Lord had said, but they refused to listen anymore. They had become too discouraged by the brutality of their slavery."
Discouraged. That spoke volumes to me. I have put myself in slavery to all sorts of sin, I know I can be self-destructive, and it's starting to affect my family. It has affected my family. But I don't know how to stop. Prayer doesn't seem to work as well as I would like it too. And I know some of that has to do with unconfessed and unrepentant sin. I acknowledge the sin, I just can't seem to take the next step. The shame, and I suppose some pride, and definitely a healthy dose of fear thrown in for good measure, keep from doing what is right. What is needed to get my heart back on the right path. I am discouraged. And my ears are stopped up. And my heart is almost as hard as Pharoah's. Maybe more so. I'm so confused ... But I have a new promise to hold onto, meditate on, claim as my own so that maybe, just maybe, I can get out of this mire and have some joy in the Lord again.
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